i can say no歌词 Say No有技巧:7种不伤害人的拒绝方式

Say No有技巧:7种不伤害人的拒绝方式  

How many ways are there to say "No" without offending anyone's feeling? Well
there is "No
I can't"
"No
I don't have time" and "No
I don't want to". But the problem is that many of us try to avoid situations that require us to say "No" to people. In almost every culture this little word is associated with rejection
failure
egoism and a lack of tact and empathy towards others.
I can not recall how many times I have eaten burnt
undercooked
bland and poorly tasting dishes simply because I did not want to hurt the feelings of the person who had cooked them. Or the times when I bought something
I did not need
because I felt guilty leaving a shop empty-handed after spending 20 minutes of the shop assistant's time.
How do you say "No" without offending anyone or feeling guilty afterwards? There is a great lesson to be learned from such approach to munication.
怎样说"不"而不冒犯他人或之后自己没有负罪感？我们可以好好学习一下这种沟通的方法。
If just like me
you sometimes find it difficult to be direct about saying "No"
you can still be assertive and express you disagreement in a more subtle
yet equally powerful way. The great thing about this method is that it gets your point across without making you look bad
unprofessional
insensitive or uncaring.
Here are 7 Sneaky Ways to Say "No" without Offending Anyone
1."This sounds interesting
but I have too much on my plate at the moment."
When you start your disagreement with a pliment: "this sounds interesting"
it makes the person less defensive and gives you a valid reason to decline "I have too much on my plate at the moment".
2."I'm sorry but last time I did ___
I had a negative experience."
This is a life-saver for me every time I have to explain to people that I do not eat meat. Before I would say that I was a vegetarian
but for some reason this explanation has never worked on hospitable Italian grandmothers. They would try to feed me bacon
sausage and octopuses (yuck!) explaining it with "this is not meat" or "I just put a little in this dish".
Now I simply say
"I'm sorry
but I can not eat meat. Last time I did
I had a terrible headache." And it works like a charm
because no one wants to hurt you on purpose.
The focus here is not on what you want or do not want to do
but on your previous bad experience.
3."I'd love to do this
but ____"
This is a great way of saying that you like the idea
you are willing to help
but you just can not do it at the moment.
Note: Just do not go into a lengthy justification of why you can not do it.
First
it is not necessary. Time is a limited resource and when you say "yes" to one task
you have to say "no" to other opportunities that might be more important
urgent and beneficial to you at the moment. Second
offering a lengthy explanation makes you sound guilty and unsure
so people might push further to see if you will agree.
4."I'm not the best person to help on this. Why don't you try X?"
If you feel that you can not contribute much to the task
have no time or lack the resources
do not beat around the bush! Let the person know it up front. This
however
does not mean that you can not be helpful. You can still refer the person to a lead they can follow up on.
5."I can't do this
but I can do ____ (less mitment)."
This is another variation of the previous method. You are saying "No" to a request
but you are still offering your help on your own terms
choosing the easier
less time-consuming mitment.
6."You look great
but ___ does not do you justice"
This is a great way to diplomatically express your opinion when someone asks you a question about their appearance
without hurting the other person's feelings (especially if the person asking you is your friend
your superior or your spouse).
7."That sounds great
but I just can't put one more thing on my calendar for the next few weeks. Let me call you ___ (specific time range)."
Sometimes you might get a proposal
an idea or a request that sounds interesting. But considering the amount of tasks on your to-do list
you do not feel like taking another mitment just yet.
In this case
instead of saying a straight out "No"
you are giving yourself time to reflect before making a final decision: "Let me call you ___ (specific time range)."
However
if you are not interested
do not leave the person hanging on. Use other ways to say "No" that are more definitive (e.g. methods #1
#2 or #3). It is more disappointing when the person is counting on you and you let them down.