狄更斯思想 狄更斯双语小说:《董贝父子》第27章Part 15

狄更斯双语小说:《董贝父子》第27章Part 15  

'You know he has bought me
' she resumed. 'Or that he will
to-morrow. He has considered of his bargain; he has shown it to his friend; he is even rather proud of it; he thinks that it will suit him
and may be had sufficiently cheap; and he will buy to-morrow. God
that I have lived for this
and that I feel it!'
Compress into one handsome face the conscious self-abasement
and the burning indignation of a hundred women
strong in passion and in pride; and there it hid itself with o white shuddering arms.
'What do you mean?' returned the angry mother. 'Haven't you from a child - '
'A child!' said Edith
looking at her
'when was I a child? What childhood did you ever leave to me? I was a woman - artful
designing
mercenary
laying snares for men - before I knew myself
or you
or even understood the base and wretched aim of every new display I learnt You gave birth to a woman. Look upon her. She is in her pride tonight'
And as she spoke
she struck her hand upon her beautiful bosom
as though she would have beaten down herself.
'Look at me
' she said
'who have never known what it is to have an honest heart
and love. Look at me
taught to scheme and plot when children play; and married in my youth - an old age of design - to one for whom I had no feeling but indifference. Look at me
whom he left a widow
dying before his inheritance descended to him - a judgment on you! well deserved! - and tell me what has been my life for ten years since.'
'We have been making every effort to endeavour to secure to you a good establishment
' rejoined her mother. 'That has been your life. And now you have got it.'
'There is no slave in a market: there is no horse in a fair: so shown and offered and examined and paraded
Mother
as I have been
for ten shameful years
' cried Edith
with a burning brow
and the same bitter emphasis on the one word. 'Is it not so? Have I been made the bye-word of all kinds of men? Have fools
have profligates
have boys
have dotards
dangled after me
and one by one rejected me
and fallen off
because you were too plain with all your cunning: yes
and too true
with all those false pretences: until we have almost e to be notorious? The licence of look and touch
' she said
with flashing eyes
'have I submitted to it
in half the places of resort upon the map of England? Have I been hawked and vended here and there
until the last grain of self-respect is dead within me
and I loathe myself? Has been my late childhood? I had none before. Do not tell me that I had
tonight of all nights in my life!'
“看着我吧，”她说道，“我从来就不知道诚实的心和爱情是什么样的。看着我吧，小时候跟小朋友一起做游戏的时候，我就被教会了耍花招，设圈套；我在青年时代——就老谋深算来说，已可以称得上是老年了——，被嫁给了一个我对他毫无感情而只是漠不关心的人。看着我吧，他让我当上了寡妇，他自己则在还没有继承遗产之前就死去了——这是上帝对你的最后审判！罪有应得！——你再告诉我吧，从那时以来的这十年，我的生活是个什么样的生活！”
“我们一直来竭尽一切努力，设法使你得到一个好家庭，”她的母亲回答道，“这就是你一直来的生活。现在你已经得到它了。”
“市场上没有一个奴隶，市集上没有一匹马曾经像我在这可耻的十年中这样被展出，被开价，被细细观察和被夸耀的，妈妈！”伊迪丝满脸怒火地喊道，她用同样讥讽的语气说出了那两个字，“难道不是这样吗？难道我没有成为各种男子的笑柄吗？难道傻瓜、色鬼、小伙子、老头子不都曾来纠缠过我，又都一个个地抛弃我和离开我了吗？因为你尽管狡猾，但却太露骨了；是的，你尽管有那些虚伪的口实，但你的真情实意是太清楚了，所以后来我们几乎声名狼藉了，“她眼中闪着怨愤的光芒，说道，“难道我不曾逆来顺受，容许在英国地图上一半的游乐场所被观看和触摸吗？难道我不曾在这里、那里被么喝和出卖，直到我失去最后一点自尊心并厌恶我自己为止吗？难道这就是我最近的童年吗？我以前不曾有过童年，无论如何也别在今晚对我说，我有过童年。”