我的生活海伦凯勒摘抄 海伦·凯勒自传《我的生活》第30期

海伦·凯勒自传《我的生活》第30期  

Chapter XIV
The winter of 1892 was darkened by the one cloud in my childhood's bright sky. Joy deserted my heart
and for a long
long time I lived in doubt
anxiety and fear. Books lost their charm for me
and even now the thought of those dreadful days chills my heart. A little story called "The Frost King
" which I wrote and sent to Mr. Anagnos
of the Perkins Institution for the Blind
was at the root of the trouble. In order to make the matter clear
I must set forth the facts connected with this episode
which justice to my teacher and to myself pels me to relate.
I wrote the story when I was at home
the autumn after I had learned to speak. We had stayed up at Fern Quarry later than usual. While we were there
Miss Sullivan had described to me the beauties of the late foliage
and it seems that her descriptions revived the memory of a story
which must have been read to me
and which I must have unconsciously retained. I thought then that I was "making up a story
" as children say
and I eagerly sat down to write it before the ideas should slip from me. My thoughts flowed easily; I felt a sense of joy in the position. Words and images came tripping to my finger ends
and as I thought out sentence after sentence
I wrote them on my braille slate. Now
if words and images e to me without effort
it is a pretty sure sign that they are not the offspring of my own mind
but stray waifs that I regretfully dismiss. At that time I eagerly absorbed everything I read without a thought of authorship
and even now I cannot be quite sure of the boundary line beeen my ideas and those I find in books. I suppose that is because so many of my impressions e to me through the medium of others' eyes and ears.
我是在家中写下那个故事的，时间是在我学会说话之后的那年秋天。当时，我们住在弗恩采石场，睡觉的时间也比平时晚得多。苏立文小姐向我描述了深秋树叶的美丽多彩，她的讲述似乎唤醒了（我对）某个故事沉睡的记忆。这个故事一定被我读到过，我一定是在不知不觉间记住了这个故事。于是我想，我也要编写一个故事。说写就写，我任凭各种各样的思绪从头脑中汩汩涌出。我体会到了文思泉涌的快乐，我发现了创作过程的喜悦。富有生命的文字和想象轻快地游走在我的指端，我把一个又一个句子写在了我的盲文木板上。如今，假如词语和想象变得唾手可得，显然，这表明它们并非是出自我思想的产物，最多只是被我头脑遗弃的零星碎片。那时，我如饥似渴地汲取我读到的任何东西，从来就不会对著作本身有什么想法。即使是现在，我也无法完全在我的思想和我读到的那些书之间划清界限。我想，这是因为我过多地接受了别人的所见所闻，我只能依靠别人的眼睛“看”世界。
When the story was finished
I read it to my teacher
and I recall now vividly the pleasure I felt in the more beautiful passages
and my annoyance at being interrupted to have the pronunciation of a word corrected. At dinner it was read to the assembled family
who were surprised that I could write so well. Some one asked me if I had read it in a book.
This question surprised me very much; for I had not the faintest recollection of having had it read to me. I spoke up and said
"Oh
no
it is my story
and I have written it for Mr. Anagnos."
Accordingly I copied the story and sent it to him for his birthday. It was suggested that I should change the title from "Autumn Leaves" to "The Frost King
" which I did. I carried the little story to the post-office myself
feeling as if I were walking on air. I little dreamed how cruelly I should pay for that birthday gift.