美食、祈祷和恋爱评价 《美食祈祷和恋爱》Chapter 60 (134):离婚高峯会谈

《美食祈祷和恋爱》Chapter 60 (134):离婚高峯会谈  

What I had wanted for so long was to have an actual conversation with my ex-husband
but this was obviously never going to happen. What I had been craving was a resolution
a peace summit
from which we could emerge with a united understanding of what had oc-curred in our marriage
and a mutual fiveness for the ugliness of our divorce. But months of counseling and mediation had only made us more divided and locked our positions solid
turning us into o people who were absolutely incapable of giving each other any release. Yet it's what we both needed
I was sure of it. And I was sure of this
too—that the rules of transcendence insist that you will not advance even one inch closer to divinity as long as you cling to even one last seductive thread of blame. As smoking is to the lungs
so is resentment to the soul; even one puff of it is bad for you. I mean
what kind of prayer is this to im-bibe—"Give us this day our daily grudge"? You might just as well hang it up and kiss God good-bye if you really need to keep blaming somebody else for your own life's limitations. So what I asked of God that night on the Ashram roof was—given the reality that I would probably never speak to my ex-husband again—might there be some level upon which we could municate? Some level on which we could five?
I lay up there
high above the world
and I was all alone. I dropped into meditation and waited to be told what to do. I don't know how many minutes or hours passed before I knew what to do. I realized I'd been thinking about all this too literally. I'd been wanting to talk to my ex-husband? So talk to him. Talk to him right now. I'd been waiting to be offered fiveness? Offer it up personally
then. Right now. I thought of how many people go to their graves unfiven and unfiving. I thought of how many people have had siblings or friends or children or lovers disappear from their lives before precious words of clemency or absolution could be passed along. How do the survivors of terminated relationships ever endure the pain of unfinished business? From that place of meditation
I found the answer—you can finish the business yourself
from within yourself. It's not only possible
it's essential.
And then
to my surprise
still in meditation
I did an odd thing. I invited my ex-husband to please join me up here on this rooftop in India. I asked him if he would be kind enough to meet me up here for this farewell event. Then I waited until I felt him arrive. And he did arrive. His presence was suddenly absolute and tangible. I could practically smell him.
而后，使我吃惊的是，就在禅坐之际，我做了件奇怪的事。我邀请前夫和我一起来到印度的这个屋顶。我请他屈驾来这儿和我碰面，参加这场离别晚会。然后我等待自己觉得他到来的时间。他来了。他突然绝对而明确地出现，我几乎闻得到他。
I said
"Hi
sweetie."