让西贝柳斯 西贝柳斯丨不要触摸蝴蝶之翼，那会让它黯然失色。

西贝柳斯丨不要触摸蝴蝶之翼，那会让它黯然失色。  

Journey to Finland: It Begins With A Painting

始于一幅画的芬兰之行

By Leon

2012 is the year I am going to Finland. It may be surprising, but although I have lovedSibelius’ music for more than two decades, and championed it for more than one, I have never been to Finland.It all begins with a painting.

2012年是我要去芬兰的那一年。这也许让人很惊讶，但尽管我已经热爱了西贝柳斯的音乐超过了二十年而且不止一次支持它，但我还从没去过芬兰。这一切都始于一幅画。

This beautiful portrait of Sibelius was painted by artistLorena Bowserof San Diego, California, for a friend. In June 2011 I was googling for a picture of Sibelius in colour, and her painting turned up. It wasfeatured on her blog, andI left a comment, complimenting her for the fine work.

这幅漂亮的西贝柳斯的肖像是由一位在加利福尼亚州圣迭戈市的艺术家洛蕾娜·波瑟（Lorena Bowser）为一位朋友所创作的。2011年六月的时候我正在谷歌搜索西贝柳斯的彩色图片，她的作品赫然出现在眼前。这幅画是在她的博客上发表的，我在下面留了言，称赞她的这幅作品是如何的精美。

Depicting Jean Sibelius in his youth (specifically thisphotograph), the painting has a remarkable glow and dignified energy, and the smoothness of the colours even imbue in it a touch of the surreal. One wonders if the painting stepped out of the photograph, or the other way.

这幅画展示出了让·西贝柳斯年轻时的模样，特别是上图照片中的模样。这幅画闪烁着杰出的光辉并且散发着令人尊敬的能量，颜色的平滑过渡甚至使这幅画有着一丝超现实主义的色彩。人们都想知道这幅画到底是直接从照片中迸发出来的，还是从其他的什么地方。

New paintings of Sibelius are not common, and always a delight to discover. Being the friendly, gregarious lady that she would turn out to be, Lorena soon befriended me on Facebook.

西贝柳斯的新画作并不常见，而且能够发现它们总会使我很兴奋。作为一位友善爱交际的女士，洛蕾娜很快在脸书（Facebook）上与我成为了好友。

The friend for whom this portrait was painted for is Erik Homenick, master of the most significant English-languagewebsite on the Japanese composer Ifukube Akira. I will always remember his reply on Lorena’s blog post:“Leon, are you THE Leon of The Flying Inkpot?”

这幅肖像画所属的那位朋友叫埃里克·霍米尼克（Erik Homenick）是日本作曲家伊福部昭最重要的英文网站主管。我总是能想起他在洛蕾娜的博客中的回复：“莱昂，你是写飞行墨罐（The Flying Inkpot）博客的那位莱昂吗？”

（译者注：作者名叫里昂，“飞行墨罐”是作者博客）

Fast forward to 2012. I joined a Sibelius forum.I don’t visit or contribute as much as I would like to, for I feel a little lost and outdated regarding Sibelius. This owes partly to the fact I did not follow Sibelius news/research much during the years between 2002 and 2009 – the same years I stopped writing online due to the demands of work and family.

时间飞逝来到了2012年，我加入了一个西贝柳斯论坛，我没有过多去看论坛或者做出贡献，因为我对西贝柳斯的研究感到有些失落和过时。这部分事实也归咎于我在2002至2009年间没有关注西贝柳斯的新闻或研究——这些年我因为工作和家庭的需要而停止了网上写作，即博客“飞行墨罐”的更新。

（编者：这句话出自作曲家西贝柳斯本人之口，译为“如果有人写出对我音乐的感受，自然而然地能体会到音乐中浑然天成的美感。如果想要通过分析来理解音乐，那么聆听时听者就不会融入到音乐最为隐秘的音响和感受中。就像蝴蝶。哪怕触碰过他们一次，蝶粉就会飘落。失去光彩固然不能影响蝴蝶的飞舞，但总会令它们黯然失色。”指作曲家不希望人们过度分析音乐，要带着自然的感受去聆听他的作品，也进一步说明了音乐大化无形道隐自然的魅力。）

But I eventually did realize that, well, people seem to remember me for my work championing Sibelius more than a decade ago.I truly feel humbled by this. It is a sentiment that I also tried to return. In January 2011, I received an email from JN of the University of Chicago, asking me for the source of theButterfly quotation.To my great consternation, at that time, despite looking through all my literature at home, I could not locate the source.

但是终有一日我意识到，人们似乎还记得我十几年前支持西贝柳斯的工作。对此我感到有些惭愧，对西贝柳斯研究的空窗期曾经使我我连这种惭愧之感都不再拥有。在2011年一月的时候，我收到了一封来自芝加哥大学的网友“JN”发来的电子邮件，向我询问西贝柳斯这句与“蝴蝶”有关的名言，出处是哪里。令我很意外的是西贝柳斯·让简介，那个时候我在家里尽力查阅了所有的文献，我依然找不到来源。

Like JN, I began to feel a shadow of doubt about its authenticity, which was made additionally painful because this is one of the most important quotations of Sibelius in my heart, that I have held close and quoted in many aFlying Inkpotarticle for decades. Because of this, every now and then, for the next year, Isearched for the reference. The failure to authenticate it bothered me very much.

正如网友“JN”一样，我开始对这句话的真实性感到怀疑，让我感到痛苦的是这句西贝柳斯的箴言是我心中最重要的名句之一，并且我在过去几十年写博文时引用过多次。也因为如此，在接下来的那一年，我不时地在寻找资料，然而却未能验证它的来源，这使我十分困扰。

Thankfully, we live in a time when Sibelius literature is still being written, for many new secrets about Finland’s composer of legend continue to be unearthed. During the ensuing year after JN’s query, a new book was published entitledJean Sibelius and His World(The Bard Music Festival), by Daniel M. Grimley.

值得庆幸的是，我们生活在西贝柳斯文学仍在创作的时代，因为许多关于这位芬兰传奇作曲家的新秘密仍被持续地发掘出来。在我不断寻找答案之后的一年，一本名为《让·西贝柳斯和他的世界》的新书发表，作者是格瑞姆雷（Daniel M. Grimley）。至于第二个重要的时刻，则是在谷歌上的意外发现拯救了我。

For a second important time, the serendipity that is Google came to my rescue. In March 2012, I googled “Sibelius butterfly” and discovered Grimley’s book in Google Books. In it is a fascinating essay by Tomi M?kel? called“The Wings of a Butterfly: Jean Sibelius and the Problem of Musical Modernity”.The quotation is there. My quest was fulfilled.

2012年三月，我谷歌搜索了“西贝柳斯 蝴蝶”然后发现了在谷歌图书里的格瑞姆雷的书。里面有一篇由汤米·马卡拉（Tomi M?kel?）所写的引人入胜的文章，名为《蝴蝶之翼：西贝柳斯与音乐现代性问题》。那令我困惑不已的箴言就在那里，问题终于解决。

All these, and the feeling of conviction as I began to publish on this blog again, slowly gathered a feeling in me. I began to feel forces compelling me to do that one thing that I’ve always know I had to do: go to Finland.You must forgive me for putting this off for so long. I am not a well-to-do person. Going on an overseas trip is not something I can do without feeling the burden, both to my savings and to my family obligations.

所有这些，以及当我开始重新在这个博客上发表东西时所感受到的一种信念，渐渐地使我有了感觉。我开始感到一种强有力的力量促使我去做一件我始终认为必须去做的事：去芬兰。你们得原谅我拖了这么久，因为我不是一个很富裕的人。海外旅行对于我来说并不是说走就走的，我要综合考虑我的积蓄和我应尽的家庭义务是否支持我。

I am a sole breadwinner. Such a trip would not come cheap. And indeed, for me, it cannot be “cheap”. It is a pilgrimage – perhaps more than that. I’m not saying that I have to stay in the finest hotels and dine at the finest restaurants, but I think, I know I owe it to myself to see and experience as much as I can, when I finally arrive in Sibelius’ homeland.

我是家里唯一的养家糊口的人，这样的一趟旅行可不便宜。而且确实，对于我来说它的意义也不“便宜”，这是一次朝圣之旅，也许还不止于此。我并不是说我必须住最好的酒店以及在最好的餐厅用餐，而是当我终于到达西贝柳斯的故乡时，我认为我要尽可能地去看去体会。

I also felt that I had to do it alone. Frankly, I did not relish having my family come along only for me to abandon them as I make for all the Sibelian shrines. Finally, I’d always thought that I would save the trip for a special anniversary, and the year 2015 (Sibelius’ 150th birthday) seemed logical and close enough. I never thought about going any earlier. Until now.

与此同时，我觉得这趟旅行必须由我一个人完成，说实话，我并不喜欢让我的家人也过来，我宁愿离开他们独自去西贝柳斯的圣地。总之，这个决定挽救了这次旅行，2015年恰好是西贝柳斯150周年诞辰，2012年我前往芬兰看起来合情合理。在此之前我从未如此恳切地想要前往那里。

Hesitantly, I made a little query on the Sibelius forum. And who would ultimately contact me but Andrew Barnett, UK Sibelius scholar, founder of theUK Sibelius Societyand writer of the notes ofBIS’s Sibelius Edition. Generously, he did something very important regarding my decision to go – he gave me dates and places. That is, an itinerary.

我犹豫不决地在西贝柳斯论坛上发了个小问题西贝柳斯·让简介，最终联系我的是安德鲁·巴内特(Andrew Barnett)，一位来自英国的西贝柳斯学者，英国西贝柳斯协会创始人以及BIS唱片公司西贝柳斯专辑的制作人。老实说，他做了一些对于我去旅行的决定有很重要参考意义的事——他给我提供了日期以及地点，也就是行程。

Before that I only knew I can only visit Finland between May and September, the periodAinolais open. Mr Barnett suggested that I follow members of the UKSS on their annual trip to theLahti Sibelius Festival. I would follow the group’s itinerary while in Lahti, including a trip to Ainola.

在此之前我只知道我只能在五月到九月期间去芬兰，这期间艾诺拉（Ainola，西贝柳斯故居）是开放参观的。巴内特先生建议我跟随UKSS成员一起去参加一年一度的在拉蒂（Lahti，芬兰城市）举办的西贝柳斯音乐节之旅。我会在拉蒂跟随小组的行程，包括前往艾诺拉。

The anxiety of going to a country over 9200 kilometres away started to fade away with this. The idea of visiting Finland became less of a dream and became closer to reality – or rather, it was a dream coming true.But before I took the plunge, a string of little miracles awaited.

来到9200公里以外的国家所带来的焦虑紧张在逐渐消失。去芬兰的想法不再只是个梦想，而是变得更接近现实——或者更确切地说，这是场圆梦之旅。但在我启程之前，还有一连串的小奇迹在等着我。

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