悉达多讲的什么 名著精读:《悉达多》-卡玛拉(1)

名著精读:《悉达多》-卡玛拉(1)  

KAMALA
Siddhartha learned something new on every step of his path
for the world was transformed
and his heart was enchanted. He saw the sun rising over the mountains with their forests and setting over the distant beach with its palm-trees. At night
he saw the stars in the sky in their fixed positions and the crescent of the moon floating like a boat in the blue. He saw trees
stars
animals
clouds
rainbows
rocks
herbs
flowers
stream and river
the glistening dew in the bushes in the morning
distant hight mountains which were blue and pale
birds sang and bees
wind silverishly blew through the rice-field. All of this
a thousand-fold and colourful
had always been there
always the sun and the moon had shone
always rivers had roared and bees had buzzed
but in former times all of this had been nothing more to Siddhartha than a fleeting
deceptive veil before his eyes
looked upon in distrust
destined to be perated and destroyed by thought
since it was not the essential existence
since this essencelay beyond
on the other side of
the visible. But now
his liberated eyes stayed on this side
he saw and became aware of the visible
sought to be at home in this world
did not search for the true essence
did not aim at a world beyond. Beautiful was this world
looking at it thus
without searching
thus simply
thus childlike. Beautiful were the moon and the stars
beautiful was the stream and the banks
the forest and the rocks
the goat and the gold-beetle
the flower and the butterfly. Beautiful and lovely it was
thus to walk through the world
thus childlike
thus awoken
thus open to what is near
thus without distrust. Differently the sun burnt the head
differently the shade of the forest cooled him down
differently the stream and the cistern
the pumpkin and the banana tasted. Short were the days
short the nights
every hour sped swiftly away like a sail on the sea
and under the sail was a ship full of treasures
full of joy. Siddhartha saw a group of apes moving through the high canopy of theforest
high in the branches
and heard their savage
greedy song. Siddhartha saw a male sheep following a female one and mating with her. In a lake of reeds
he saw the pike hungrily hunting for its dinner; propelling themselves away from it
in fear
wiggling and sparkling
the young fish jumped in droves out of the water; the scent of strength and passion came forcefully out of the hasty eddies of the water
which the pike stirred up
impetuously hunting.
All of this had always existed
and he had not seen it; he had not been with it. Now he was with it
he was part of it. Light and shadow ran through his eyes
stars and moon ran through his heart.
On the way
Siddhartha also remembered everything he had experienced in the Garden Jetavana
the teaching he had heard there
the divine Buddha
the farewell from Govinda
the conversation with the exalted one. Again he remembered his own words
he had spoken to the exalted one
every word
and with astonishment he became aware of the fact that there he had said things which he had not really known yet at this time. What he had said to Gotama: his
the Buddha's
treasure and secret was not the teachings
but the unexpressable and not teachable
which he had experienced in the hour of his enlightenment--it was nothing but this very thing which he had now gone to experience
what he now began to experience. Now
he had to experience his self. It is true that he had already known for a long time that his self was Atman
in its essence bearing the same eternal characteristics as Brahman. But never
he had really found this self
because he had wanted to capture it in the of thought. With the body definitely not being the self
and not the spectacle of the senses
so it also was not the thought
not the rational mind
not the learned wisdom
not the learned ability to draw conclusions and to develop previous thoughts in to new ones. No
this world of thought was also still on this side
and nothing could be achieved by killing the random self of the senses
if the random self of thoughts and learned knowledge was fattened on the other hand. Both
the thoughts as well as the senses
were pretty things
the ultimate meaning was hidden behind both of them
both had to be listened to
both had to be played with
both neither had to be scorned nor overestimated
from both the secret voices of the innermost truth had to be attentively perceived. He wanted to strive for nothing
except for what the voice manded him to strive for
dwell on nothing
except where the voice would advise him to do so. Why had Gotama
at that time
in the hour of all hours
sat down under the bo-tree
where the enlightenment hit him? He hadheard a voice
a voice in his own heart
which had manded him to seek rest under this tree
and he had neither preferred self-castigation
offerings
ablutions
nor prayer
neither food nor drink
neither sleep nor dream
he had obeyed the voice. To obey like this
not to an external mand
only to the voice
to be ready like this
this was good
this was necessary
nothing else was necessary.
In the night when he slept in the straw hut of a ferryman by the river
Siddhartha had a dream: Govinda was standing in front of him
dressed in the yellow robe of an ascetic. Sad was how Govinda looked like
sadly he asked: Why have you forsaken me? At this
he embraced Govinda
wrapped his arms around him
and as he was pulling him close to his chest and kissed him
it was not Govinda any more
but a woman
and a full breast popped out of the woman's dress
at which Siddhartha lay and drank
sweetly and strongly tasted the milk from this breast. It tasted of woman and man
of sun and forest
of animal and flower
of every fruit
of every joyful desire. It intoxicated him and rendered him unconscious.--When Siddhartha woke up
the pale river shimmered through the door of the hut
and in the forest
a dark call of an owl resounded deeply and pleasantly.
When the day began
Siddhartha asked his host
the ferryman
to get him across the river. The ferryman got him across the river on his bamboo-raft
the wide water shimmered reddishly in the light of the morning.
"This is a beautiful river
" he said to his panion.