悉达多悟到了什么 名著精读:《悉达多》-船伕(8)

名著精读:《悉达多》-船伕(8)  

Kamala looked into his eyes. She spoke with a heavy tongue
paralysed by the poison. "You've bee old
my dear
" she said
"you've bee gray. But you are like the young Samana
who at one time came without clothes
with dusty feet
to me into the garden. You are much more like him
than you were like him at that time when you had left me and Kamaswami. In the eyes
you're like him
Siddhartha. Alas
I have also grown old
old--could you still recognise me?"
Siddhartha smiled: "Instantly
I recognised you
Kamala
my dear."
Kamala pointed to her boy and said: "Did you recognise him as well? He is your son."
Her eyes became confused and fell shut. The boy wept
Siddhartha took him on his knees
let him weep
petted his hair
and at the sight of the child's face
a Brahman prayer came to his mind
which he had learned a long time ago
when he had been a little boy himself. Slowly
with a singing voice
he started to speak; from his past and childhood
the words came flowing to him. And with that singsong
the boy became calm
was only now and then uttering a sob and fell asleep. Siddhartha placed him on Vasudeva's bed. Vasudeva stood by the stove and cooked rice. Siddhartha gave him a look
which he returned with a smile.
"She'll die
" Siddhartha said quietly.
Vasudeva nodded; over his friendly face ran the light of the stove's fire.
Once again
Kamala returned to consciousness. Pain distorted her face
Siddhartha's eyes read the suffering on her mouth
on her pale cheeks. Quietly
he read it
attentively
waiting
his mind being one with her suffering. Kamala felt it
her gaze sought his eyes.
Looking at him
she said: "Now I see that your eyes have changed as well. They've bee pletely different. By what do I still recognise that you're Siddhartha? It's you
and it's not you."