悉达多悟到了什么 名著精读:《悉达多》-戈塔马(3)

名著精读:《悉达多》-戈塔马(3)  

Quoth Siddhartha: "One thing
oh most venerable one
I have admired in your teachings most of all. Everything in your teachings is perfectly clear
is proven; you are presentingthe world as a perfect chain
a chain which is never and nowhere broken
an eternal chain the links of which are causes and effects. Never before
this has been seen so clearly;never before
this has been presented so irrefutably; truly
the heart of every Brahman has to beat stronger with love
once he has seen the world through your teachingsperfectly connected
without gaps
clear as a crystal
not depending on chance
not depending on gods. Whether it may be good or bad
whether living according to it would besuffering or joy
I do not wish to discuss
possibly this is not essential--but the uniformity of the world
that everything which happens is connected
that the great and thesmall things are all enpassed by the same forces of time
by the same law of causes
of ing into being and of dying
this is what shines brightly out of your exaltedteachings
oh perfected one. But according to your very own teachings
this unity and necessary sequence of all things is nevertheless broken in one place
through a small gap
this world of unity is invaded by something alien
something new
something which had not been there before
and which cannot be demonstrated and cannot be proven: these areyour teachings of overing the world
of salvation. But with this small gap
with this small breach
the entire eternal and uniform law of the world is breaking apart againand bees void. Please five me for expressing this objection."
Quietly
Gotama had listened to him
unmoved. Now he spoke
the perfected one
with his kind
with his polite and clear voice: "You've heard the teachings
oh son of a Brahman
and good for you that you've thought about it thus deeply. You've found a gap in it
an error. You should think about this further. But be warned
oh seeker of knowledge
of thethicket of opinions and of arguing about words. There is nothing to opinions
they may be beautiful or ugly
smart or foolish
everyone can support them or discard them. But theteachings
you've heard from me
are no opinion
and their goal is not to explain the world to those who seek knowledge. They have a different goal; their goal is salvation fromsuffering. This is what Gotama teaches
nothing else."
"I wish that you
oh exalted one
would not be angry with me
" said the young man. "I have not spoken to you like this to argue with you
to argue about words. You are trulyright
there is little to opinions. But let me say this one more thing: I have not doubted in you for a single moment. I have not doubted for a single moment that you areBuddha
that you have reached the goal
the highest goal towards which so many thousands of Brahmans and sons of Brahmans are on their way. You have found salvation from has e to you in the course of your own search
on your own path
through thoughts
through meditation
through realizations
through enlightenment. It has not e to youby means of teachings! And--thus is my thought
oh exalted one
--nobody will obtain salvation by means of teachings! You will not be able to convey and say to anybody
ohvenerable one
in words and through teachings what has happened to you in the hour of enlightenment! The teachings of the enlightened Buddha contain much
it teaches many tolive righteously
to avoid evil. But there is one thing which these so clear
these so venerable teachings do not contain: they do not contain the mystery of what the exaltedone has experienced for himself
he alone among hundreds of thousands. This is what I have thought and realized
when I have heard the teachings. This is why I am continuing mytravels--not to seek other
better teachings
for I know there are none
but to depart from all teachings and all teachers and to reach my goal by myself or to die. But often
I'll think of this day
oh exalted one
and of this hour
when my eyes beheld a holy man."
The Buddha's eyes quietly looked to the ground; quietly
in perfect equanimity his inscrutable face was smiling.
"I wish
" the venerable one spoke slowly
"that your thoughts shall not be in error
that you shall reach the goal! But tell me: Have you seen the multitude of my Samanas
mymany brothers
who have taken refuge in the teachings? And do you believe
oh stranger
oh Samana
do you believe that it would be better for them all the abandon the teachingsand to return into the life the world and of desires?"
"Far is such a thought from my mind
" exclaimed Siddhartha. "I wish that they shall all stay with the teachings
that they shall reach their goal! It is not my place to judgeanother person's life. Only for myself
for myself alone
I must decide
I must chose
I must refuse. Salvation from the self is what we Samanas search for
oh exalted one. If Imerely were one of your disciples
oh venerable one
I'd fear that it might happen to me that only seemingly
only deceptively my self would be calm and be redeemed
but that intruth it would live on and grow
for then I had replaced my self with the teachings
my duty to follow you
my love for you
and the munity of the monks!"
With half of a smile
with an unwavering openness and kindness
Gotama looked into the stranger's eyes and bid him to leave with a hardly noticeable gesture.
"You are wise
oh Samana."
the venerable one spoke."You know how to talk wisely
my friend. Be aware of too much wisdom!"
The Buddha turned away
and his glance and half of a smile remained forever etched in Siddhartha's memory.
I have never before seen a person glance and smile
sit and walk this way
he thought; truly
I wish to be able to glance and smile
sit and walk this way
too
thus free
thusvenerable
thus concealed
thus open
thus child-like and mysterious. Truly
only a person who has succeeded in reaching the innermost part of his self would glance and walkthis way. Well so
I also will seek to reach the innermost part of my self.